My grandmother grew up in this tiny village in Barbados, and she was the only kid in the village to have a cricket bat. She used to play with all the boys, but then they started stealing the bat every time she bought it out of the house and saying that she couldn’t play because girls shouldn’t play sport. So one day she invited them to come play cricket, then set fire to the bat and made them watch it burn, so none of them could play cricket anymore. She was 11.
guys
perfume
that smells like books
if you wear this I’ll probably fall in love with you
I WILL WEAR THIS
THE HOT TASTY BOOKWORMS OF THE WORLD WILL BE MINE MWAHAHAHAHAAA…
To just sleep in a car like this, with your best friend or boyfriend and not worry because its just you two and tomorrow you’re just going to climb out of bed and into the front of the car where you’ll drive off. Another day on your road trip together, living, laughing, loving.
But then you hear a noise outside. Your friend goes to investigate and never comes back. You wait, and then decide to go looking for them. You grab a torch and climb out and scan the trees with the light.
You hear a dripping noise behind you.
You turn around and see water dripping onto the car, but it’s not raining. You shine the torch onto the water, and realise it’s red. It’s blood. You look up, and there’s your friend, hanging from the tree above, stomach ripped open and hand reaching down, dripping blood.
You go to scream but then something hits you from behind.
You were in the first five minutes of Supernatural.
BEFORE THE POST EVEN STARTED I KNEW
I KNEW IT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN
it’d be cool to speak like 20 different languages & keep it a secret from everyone & then during a time of crisis, u could speak some fluent russian to some russian guy holding a gun to your head & all your friends will be like daaamn
when you happen to mention never personally wanting to have kids and someone decides to butt in and remind you not to worry and that “you’ll change your mind in time”
Dumbledore: Welcome back to another year of Hogwarts!
Dumbledore: I actually don't know why your parents still send you here
Dumbledore: There's like a 30% chance you'll die tragically
Dumbledore: And it just goes up every year
Dumbledore: I guess that just means all your parents hate you
Dumbledore: Great let's have some pumpkin juice
Dumbledore: 30 points go to Griffindor for Harry's breathing techniques
